binge knitting

Merry Christmas to you to, but I'll get to that later, maybe another day. I've figured out how to combine my two topics for this space, knitting and a lack of children.
I would like to confess that I've figured out, I'm a binge knitter. I'll explain. I've been a relatively clucking person since almost before I was married, looking up birthing websites, pricing prams on eBay, deciding exactly what sort of nappies I'd want to make, you get the picture. At first I'd try to resist the impulse, I didn't need to be looking up all of this stuff, I certainly wasn't going to be having a baby in the near future, I had a wedding to plan then uni work to do. After a year of two though the impulse gets really hard to resist and so I found that if I gave into it just a bit, maybe just to wander through the baby isle at Target or knit some bootees, then it wasn't so bad and it would go away. Then at the beginning of the year, we decide to go for it, so for just a couple of months, it looked like I would have a baby in the near future. I could, nay I probably needed to, look up all this information and start accumulating stuff. We bought a cot, decided precisely what sort of pram we wanted, bought knitting and sewing patterns and I even started sewing the odd outfit or two. And the months passed with nothing but packs of Panadine to show for them.
So now the year is almost up, one more cycle to wait out before it's official and my bootee collection is almost embarrassing, I honestly don't know how many I have made. My cluckyness is out of place again, it really doesn't look like we'll be having a baby anytime soon so I binge. I have 50 bootees and some yarn in many colours and I'm working my through duck feet and pixie boots and lacy ones and fuzzy ones. Some I give away, some disapper into the big crate I have that is almost bursting with knitted baby clothes.
Most of what is in the crate will never be worn by a baby, not that I'm depressed that we'll never have one, but because they were for the most part made of what ever I had to hand, not really careing about gauge, size or yarn. It was the act of making them that was their purpose. Maybe for the ray of hope that they would be used (but that sound oh so schmaltzy) or maybe to indulge in doing what I really shouldn't, making baby clothes for one that doesn't exist.

One the lighter side though, binge knitting could be seen to have its uses. It won't make you fat, if anything, it counts as excersise, it uses up stash and gives one a near endless supply of small presents (assuming you're not me and do actually knit something other than bootees, when going on a binge).

Christmas was great, but I'll leave that for another day.

Bits, bobs and sub-fertility

I shall now make excuses for not writing an entry for more than a week. Mr b^3 has been home every day and making it hard for me to get to the computer. I don't like writing my entries with anyone around, which is strange seeing as I'm putting it all up on the internet where anyone can read it.

So, things that have happened. The big one was that Mr b^3 graduated! He is now finished with university for a while and can go and get a proper job to keep me in the lifestyle to which I would like to become acustomed. On that front he had a second interview for a company he would really, really like to work for yesterday and we'll know by Christmas if he's got it or not. The job would mean him spending a fair amount of time in Sydney (three hours by car/bus away) but, considering that some of the government jobs he was going for would put him in woop-woop, Queensland for months on end, Sydney isn't half so bad.
I've applied for a new job as a library clerk at uni. All I've heard back is that my application has been passed on to the selection group. The job doesn't start till late Feburary so I don't think their in a real rush to get through the selection process.

I've just completed my 11th cycle since I came off the pill, so only one more cycle until we are officially sub-fertile. I'm oddly looking foward to that. We've had a pretty good idea that something is wrong for about 3 months so getting to the point at which it's official and we can start to do something about it will feel like moving foward again.

One last point for knitting content. I thought I'd been good and finished all of my Christmas knitting a week early. I then, full of confidence, agreed to make a tiny lace cardigan for my sister. "How hard," I thought, "could it be to make something that starts at the underarms, doesn't have to meet at the front and is made on 6mm needles?" Turns out, harder or more properly, more boring than I thought. but she's going away for a week over Christmas, so she can have it when she gets back.

Babies and knitting content.

I can confuse myself very easily sometimes. One day I am jealous and upset when I hear the news of a friend L having her baby and almost cry when I see photos. The next day I am fine with going to visit a different friend S and helping her with her baby. I kind of know why the difference though. With L's baby I was hormonal and tired and she just seemed to have it so easy. For S, I know that she's had a really hard time and I really just want to help her.

I had a call the other day to ask if I would take an earlier ob's appointment, heart leapping I said yes, thinking that anything to reduce the two month waiting time would be good. So my new appointment is now at 10.30 am instead of 11am. Woohoo.

This is my current main knitting project. (See, I said I'd get to knitting eventually.) It's the sideways spencer from an issue of Interweave Knits, I think. I borrowed the pattern from a friend and can't quite remember what issue it is. I've got one sleave and the fronts done now, only another sleeve and the miles of ribbing to go. I think this might actually work as a garment on me though so I shall plough on, only letting summer heat, temptation of socks, wayward stops to knit pointless booties and other such things to way lay me.

Learning Patience

When I said that I was going to write about my knitting here it was true, but I actually want to talk about me and my life here, as well as my knitting. Over the summer, there is going to be more me and less knitting, because I don't knit much when it's hot and uni's out.
A friend had her baby yesterday. A girl, 4kg, back at home same day as the birth. My first reaction was 'that's wonderful and exciting and brilliant for them.' After that though I found myself getting a bit upset that it wasn't me, which really surprised me. I thought I was getting on with the whole patience thing. But we've been trying for almost 10 months now, December would have been the earliest due date for me. Now I'm here and there's no sign of a baby. We're not quite up to a year of trying yet, that will come in February, but my families history would tend to indicate that it shouldn't be taking this long. Now I've got a whole summer of could have beens to face because I've almost certain that we're going to make it to February with no baby, just more cycles of trying. On the upside though I've already got an OB's appointment booked for February so at least that's something to look forward to. And if I do get pregnant between now and then, brilliant.

Me again

Haven't been able to post really for a bit, it was the weekend and I had trouble getting to the computer. I did however, make it to knitting on Sunday and finally get the the end of the fronts for the Sideways Spencer from Interweave knits. Now I've only got a sleeve and all of the ribbing to go.
I'm up before dawn this morning with the sniffles, but at least I slept until five, which is by no means the worst time I've ever gotten up.
Today, if I'm really good, I'll get the apron that I've had cut out for a month now, sewn. First though I have to figure out a place for all of the stuff that's crept onto my sewing table.

Enough of that already, now 51-75 things about me.
51. I work for Woolworths as a deli assistant.
52. The deli I work in is the busiest in the ACT in terms of weekly turnover.
53. It is also the smallest, in terms of floor space, this means that when it is really busy, I walk into people a lot.
54. I do not have the gift of co-ordination, this took Mr b some getting used to.
55. I do not buy full sugar soft-drink partly because of my lack of co-ordination, if you spill diet soft-drink everywhere, it doesn't go sticky and cleans up like water.
56. I am growing my hair, just past waist length now.
57. I am trying, ever so slowly to loose weight, only about 10 kg to go.
58. When I was 17 I had size I boobs. That's as in A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, FF, G, H, I.
59. Just before I turned 18, I had a breast reduction and went from an I to just above a C.
60. This meant having about a kilo removed from each breast.
61. It also means that my chances of being able to breast feed are about zero to none, assuming I get to having a baby.
62. I did know that this would be the case before my surgery.
63. My favourite colour is blue, I think, though I do go in for some pinks, purples and browns.
64. One of the colours I look best in is brown.
65. I will maintain that I have blonde hair to my dyeing day (pun intended)
66. I have my first white hair, this shouldn't happen to you at 22, but the news isn't good because
67. My mother was almost completely white by the time she was 30.
68. I absolutely love living in Canberra, the best place in Australia for me to live.
69. I really like being able to walk down the street and be able to catch a bus to almost anywhere it the city.
70. My town centre is the fastest growing region in the country.
71. I used to sew most of my clothes until recently.
72. I swear, I will never try to knit a baby coverall again, much faster to sew them.
73. I did a year of reading Russian at uni, most of it I've forgotten, but I'm pleased that I did it.
74. I have also studied physics, astrophysics, maths, IT, geology, chemistry, linguistics (failed).
75. This is all I'll list, the rest I'll just write about.

It's all about me!

So, since I really don't have much happening right now, I'll give you the next instalment, 26-50 things about me.
Btw, mr b^3 is my husband, I never much liked dh.
26. I own a cot.
27. We don't have any children, though not through lack of trying.
28. In February, we can really start to find out why.
29. I knit and sew a lot of baby clothes, some of which I give away.
30. I thought we'd be one of the first couples in our group of friends to reproduce, but we're not.
31. Most of my friends are married and under 28.
32. I can weird out my co-workers when they figure out how old I am and that I'm married.
33. I keep thinking, am I a grown up yet?
34. I think I will be when I stop wondering.
35. My parents-in-law don't know that we're trying for kids, but I think they suspect a bit.
36. I might just tell them soon, maybe.
37. I used to get panic attacks when I thought that I might get pregnant before we started trying.
38. That seems really funny now.
39. I spend far to much time looking a sew-your-own nappy sites for 'when we get babies'.
40. Then I go and look and expensive apartments for 'just incase we can't'.
41. I had 13 fillings in my teeth this year, my teeth are soft, probably from no fluorine in the water where I grew up.
42. I have a personality that really likes to show-off.
43. This makes me look ridiculous, so I squash it as much as possible.
44. I like to bake.
45. I spent my tax return this year on a bench mixer that would knead bread dough.
46. I love making bread, except the kneading.
47. My speciality is chullah, Jewish Sabbath bread.
48. I'm not Jewish, but I still feel a bit pleased with myself if I manage to make it for Friday night.
49. This summer, I'm learning to clean the house.
50. Cleaning had all been mr b^3's job, but he's out getting a proper job, so now I have to learn how.

That's it for now, more later perhaps.